ADD SOME MORE IF YOU HAVE ANY!

.. you always have rice cooked and ready to served in the pot

.. your parents call you a motherfucker in khmer

.. you dont have anything to eat but rice with soy sauce

.. you go to a party and all the adults are gambling

.. you have a big picture of ANGKOR WAT in your living room

.. your parents try to sound sophistocated while conversing with a white person but end up sounding like a fob

.. your parents go to "Khmer Blockbuster" [some house with people who sell all the khmer DVDs and videos] every weekend to get the lastest DVDs and movies

.. at a party, there are always the khmer moms cooking meat kabobs and the khmer dads are all together talking outside, smoking, drinking, and BBQing

.. your dad sings or dances to Khmer songs

.. your dad wears a sarong with no shirt on around the house

.. all you use is prang kalah(tiger balm) for pain and any other discomfort

.. you know what the game of Ka Hom is

.. you have straw mats instead of carpeting around the house

.. you drive a toyota

.. your parents always ask for tylenol.

.. you're darker than most asians

.. you were younger and were just beaten with a stick that you had to pick off of the tree for your mom or dad. after the beating, you run off, and while you were crying and hiding in a room, you decide never to come out, then you get hungry.. and mom or dad just cooked something that smells oh-so-good like cha or something.. and then your stomach growls of starvation but your trying to stay in the room.. then all of a sudden, the angry beast (your mom or dad) walks into the room and asks if your hungry and acts like nothing happened

.. you were young, your parents would beat you with either chopsticks or hangers, until they broke or whip your ass with a belt

.. you've had at least one shoe thrown at your head, by your mother, when you didn't do the dishes and/or take out the trash

.. your whole american dvd collection is bootleg

.. you have a sewing machine in your house.. or at least a broken sewing machine from the eighties, early ninties

.. grown ups call you, guys say baht and girls say chaah

.. your dad wants them old Toyota Cressidas

.. everybodys your cousin

.. your backyard has a garden filled with stuff you'll soon to be eating

.. you love pahok and try to make your friends eat it

.. you see little kids drunk off Hennessy at a wedding reception

.. you know you're a Khmer chick if you got an ass

.. there's la hong in your garden

.. your remote has tape all around it

.. your house is filled with tons of khmer people that are drinking, smoking, and gambling

.. you eat so damn much

.. everything that is said, sounds funny


..you've got 50 pairs of shoes outside your door.. on a regular basis

.. your feet never touch your pillows

.. one of your friends or family members come back from cambodia they bring dried fish wrapped in newspapers, and try to sell it to everyone

.. you have a family member who goes to cambodia to find a wife

.. a white person asks you to speak khmer, you talk about noodles. "Do you want to eat mi?"

.. you get in trouble with your mom if you throw away toothpaste without squeezing the toothpaste tube completely flat

.. your parents stock food for a disaster.. especially water and pahok

.. your grandma lives in some ghetto housing

.. your uncles all have the same kind of car

.. a lot of your friends are korean or phillipino

.. your name is almost the same as your brother's, sister's, and cousin's names.

.. you get smacked by your mom because you dont Jampah your elders

.. there is khmer related anything on tv, you call up all of your friends and family to watch it too

.. you watched Tomb Raider, and kept rewinding the movie to the part where Angelina Jolie tries to speak Khmer, just to figure out what she said

.. you think the word for "gay" in khmer is funny

.. your parents greet an old friend with a swear

.. your mom forces your friends to eat her food

.. people mistaken you for being filip, indian, viet, chinese or hawaiian

.. you know someone's parents who own a donut shop

.. the only DVDs your parents own are cambodian karaoke ones

.. you call everybody your aunt or uncle

.. the only alcohol you drink is Heineken, Corona and Hennessey

.. people arrive at your house while you're having dinner, and you always force them to stay and eat

.. you never use your dishwasher, you only use it to store dishes

.. you bring the rice cooker to picnics

.. your parents always interrogate you about your friends

.. you watch khmer dubbed chinese movies

.. your family gets invited to weddings every other weekend

.. your little baby cousins know how to dance khmer.. especially when the karoake gets going..

.. your cousins know how to sapeah before they learn how to wave good bye

.. you like to eat crab apples

.. you love Bok Lahong

.. you eat everything with Bok Mathea

.. you see an apple tree on the highway. you stop, and you pick it

..while you are picking from the apple tree you see a cop so you jump from the tree and run for your life

.. you take advantage of the free refills at McDonalds or any other place that has the same offer

.. you go eat out with a lot of your relatives and parent's friends at a restaurant, and when it's time to pay the bill, it takes five minutes to do so because everyone freakin' WANTS to pay the bill even if they were just the guest

.. your parents call white people French (parange)

.. it's you're birthday, and half of the people that are at your party are people you don't know

.. you go all the way to long beach to have to party.. and when you tell a group of black people you're half black, so you can say nigger, THEY BELIEVE YOU!

.. you go to a restaurant to eat or when you bring home leftovers, and your mom says that she can cook whatever it is you ordered, better.. and then she tries to make it for dinner the next night

.. when your fingers smells like bahok


....you have chinese sausage and noodles for backup food.

.....Your parents compare you to other kids who are clearly worse than you and wonder why you aren't more like them.

.....Your parents complain when you're going out too much. When you stay in they complain at what a loser kid they have.

.....You've had ice cream on bread.

...When you dawt seh in teh park and everyone stares as they go by. Some join.

....You don't have family breakfast, lunch, dinner, you eat when hungry.

....If you try to have a conversation while eating you get yelled at by your parents. Eating is serious business.

...when people ask you to dance and instead of busting a move you bust into Rom Vong.

....when you dont think it is weird if adults dont ask you for your name but they ask you what's ur parents name.

.....when spending a day in the kitchen with your mom means having yellow stained hands for 2 days from bok-ing kroeung

...... when you tend to automatically bend forward when walking infront of older khmer people.

......when you can't find your god damn shoe when you go to temple.

... if you have ever stepped all over your parents when you were younger... literally. On the back, legs, arms and ass..

...your mom/dad/aunt/uncle cuts your hair and they been giving you the same haircut for the past 18 years..once u get your hair cut professionally done they get pissed off at you

..your family idea of fishing involves a giant net for collecting little sardines while fishermen just look at you and wonder why you're just catching bait

..your family on the beach goes into the water fully clothed, the concept of swimsuits are lost to them

..Your mom asks you if you want to "NYUM BAI," you ask her what's for dinner, she says "BAI..." then you have to further ask "...rice with what?" in order to find out what the real main course is.

..On that note, bai is always the main course and meat and everything else are just sides. That's why your bowl of rice is always filled with barely any room for anything else...

...your parents like to mix the color up and you have to play the guessing game..such as blue and green if u get the wrong one they smack u and call u stupid what i usually do is bring both color..than i get smacked anyways so either way i get smacked..there is no pleasing the parents..

...you are related to EVERYONE....

..parents gamble all night long than complain that they have no money

too hard

you need to site your source Alex buddy i know for a fact you did not come up with that all by yourself

..you call adults pu and oum even if you're not related to them


I made that one up myself. ONE POINT for CHHOU

Its some I found all over teh intarwebz.

Lol. Most are quite true though. Hilarioussss.

- Your parents gave you and your siblings that stupid bowl haircut. And for some reason they think it's cute.

- Your parents love money a little more than they love you.

- You still take your shoes off and leave them at the door even if you're going into a white person's house. Or something.

- You own the same rug as every other Cambodian.

- You have an illegal black box.

...when u eat laying down, your parents say that if you eat like that you turn into an alligator.

...when u ask your parents where u come from, they say they picked u up from the trash can.

...u turn your garage into either a sweat shop or another bedroom for your uncle to sleep in.

...ur aunt drives a mercedes-benz, and still live in a rundown apartment.

...u know about the "michael chak saang" joke or the "touv yo tah" joke.

I made these up in ten minutes!

... when a relative you haven't seen in a looong time comes to visit, the first thing they say to you is... "YOU GOT FAT!"

- you eat on top of newspapers

- and to that, you use newspapers instead of tablecloth

- your furniture is covered with bedsheets

- you hide your tv, computer, etc. under a kansaang

- you have aluminum foil above your stove

- your pots are stored in your oven

- and to that, the food that was saved for you is also in the oven/microwave

- you find all the sticks/objects you've been beaten with under the sofa or above the fridge

- your elders call you "ayuk moyroy." which at that age would be considered wise,
which they're pretty much calling you a smart ass.

- your parents get so furious, even they can't understand the gibberish coming out of their own mouth,
and ends up pointing and say "truew alluew heuy aang!"

- there's blessed strings tied to all of your cars and most of the doorknobs around the house.

LOL at finding the objects you've been beaten with under the sofa/above the fridge.